Gender roles, housework, Conflict among Couples

Life in a relationship and gender roles are among the core topics in FReDA. The analyses by Detlev Lück, Lena C. Frembs, Martin Bujard and Ulrich Weih shed light on these topics: They look at satisfaction with the division of labour in the household and at common themes in arguments in relationships. Their analyses also reveal gender roles in mothers' and fathers' perceived ideal working hours as well as gender-specific concerns during the Corona pandemic. Below is an excerpt from their study "Gender Roles, Housework, Conflict Among Couples", which was published in issue 1/2023 of the series "Bevölkerungsforschung Aktuell" by the Federal Institute for Population Research (BiB).

A central issue in partnerships is the division of the most important and time-consuming joint responsibilities: On the one hand, gainful employment and, on the other, housework and care work, usually the care and upbringing of children or the care of family members. The area of responsibility for housework, which is traditionally attributed to women, is now divided somewhat more egalitarian between the partners in a relationship than it was in the 1960s. But even today, the FReDA data show that cleaning, cooking and laundry, for example, are primarily the responsibility of the woman in many partnerships.

Unequal division of household labour promotes dissatisfaction

As Figure 1 shows, an unequal distribution leads to dissatisfaction from the person who is more involved. Respondents who say they "always" or "mostly" take care of a household activity generally express lower satisfaction with the division of housework. For example, women who always do the laundry in their relationship rate their satisfaction with the division of housework on a scale of 0 to 10 at about 6.7 on average, a comparatively low value. This is similarly true for men who do the laundry alone – even if this is much less common compared to women. Similar results are found for other household activities such as cooking or cleaning. Whether the household work is shared equally or whether the female or male partner does more makes hardly any difference to satisfaction. A high level of satisfaction among both partners only occurs when "both equally" shoulder the housework.

Figure 1: Satisfaction with the division of housework in relation to the division of laundry

As can be assumed from the findings on (dis)satisfaction with the division of housework, this is also a frequent topic of conflict in partnerships (see Figure 2). When asked how often they argue with their partner about various topics, housework is mentioned particularly often. However, the division of tasks does not necessarily have to be the subject of the dispute in every case; it could also be about how they complete the housework, for example. The second frequently mentioned conflict topic is leisure time activities.

Figure 2: Topics couples argue about, by age

Certain conflict topics gain and lose relevance over the life course because they only play a role in the couples' everyday life in certain phases of life. Figure 2 illustrates this according to the age of the interviewee. Thus, the topic of family planning gains in importance between 20 and 30 and loses importance beyond 40, when family planning is completed for most couples. Couples argue about child rearing when they have underage children: typically, beyond 30.

Conclusion

From the search for a partner to separation, the FReDA data shed light on various aspects of relationship life, of which only excerpts have been shown here. The question of how couples organise their everyday life and how they manage the balancing act between housework, raising children and gainful employment is still central. Accordingly, it is often a source of dissatisfaction and conflict. Over the past decades, there has been a trend towards sharing the tasks in the partnership equally between two couples. However, there is still often a gap between wish and reality.

The complete analysis "Gender Roles, Housework, Conflict Among Couples" by Detlev Lück, Lena C. Frembs, Martin Bujard and Ulrich Weih can be found in the current issue "Bevölkerungsforschung Aktuell" from the Federal Institute for Population Research (BiB).

You can download the issue here.